Inertia

It's one of those nights. Here I am, at the end of a long work week, exhausted, thinking about doing something creative, and completely unable to motivate myself. I feel restless, and can't seem to settle into anything.

As we approach the birth of my granddaughter, the whole household seems to be holding its breath in an odd sort of way. The atmosphere is heavy as we wait.

I have an inch to go on the last baby sweater, which I should be able to knock out in no time, but I don't even feel like picking it up. Perhaps tomorrow morning, before work.

Yes, work. Maybe that's my problem. It's Friday night, but it's not Friday night, because I have to get up at four, like any other day of the week. This weekend, I do not own my weekend. Five hours belong to my employer.

What I really need more than anything is some quality "alone time" in this house. I tried to record a couple of songs last night, but dogs barked, kids galumphed loudly up and down the hallways, telemarketers intruded, the grocery guy arrived...you get the picture. Too many noisy interruptions! I haven't even listened to the recordings yet. I'm afraid to. It was such an unproductive session, I doubt anything is salvageable. I'll face it sometime tomorrow and see what happens.

Right now, I just feel an overwhelmingly pervasive sense of "blue." Perhaps "bedways is rightways," and things will look brighter in the morning.